Monday, September 15, 2008

Faintheart never fucked a fat pig

Occasionally, I stumble across stuff written about me in the blogosphere. Sometimes, it makes me giggle and sometimes, I think "Cor blimey - you should get out more." When news broke of the book deal and cyber heroes "had a go", I thought "Fair do's". Every now and then, the anonymous bully-bore lopes on to the blog, loathes it, sniffles, snipes, carps and witters, and you think: "Everybody's entitled to their opinion." That, and: "If you waste your time reading something you hate, more fool you, mate." Today, I ambled onto someone's blog, followed a link, allowed my curiosity to get the better of me - and, if you didn't know, already, let's say the blogosphere is no wonderland. Boy, people can be mean.

You know what - here's a message to the meanies. I don't care what you say. (Kills you, doesn't it?)

I am a journalist. I spent 20 years writing for national newspapers and working in TV. I got to write a book. It is officially a bestseller. I may well write another. I earned a lot of money. (Shedloads - makes it worse, doesn't it?) I did not get the book deal because I know shorthand and the number for the Buckingham palace switchboard - I got the book deal because my blog is better than your blog. Yes it is. A fuck of a lot better. A fuck of a fuck of a lot better. (Everybody is entitled to their opinion, remember.) Blogging gave me an outlet, readers who "get" what I am doing (sometimes, it might even make them laugh, sometimes, it might make them cry and sometimes, it might make them think: "This woman needs to get over herself." ) It also gave me friends who travelled oceans to meet me and friends who are never going to meet me. And you know what - my blog is my blog. That means I do not have to follow your poxy, witless, fucking rules, you sad schmucks. I do not care if everybody you know in your circle of blogging penpals thinks you write better than I do. I do not care if you think I am shaggable or not shaggable, if you think I am a witless girly pop-tart or a pompous middle-class loser. Know me - I am all of these. Suck it up mate. I got the book deal. Get over yourselves and move on. You sit down and write a book. Stop fannying on commenting on each other's blogs about quite how bad I am. Walk the walk. Blog the blog. Write your own fucking book.

Just thought I might clear that up before I start the next one.
(By the way, Northumberland Tourism has a nice competition you might want to enter. The air up here is marvellous.)

123 comments:

katyboo1 said...

Rage, rage, against all the fat pigs etc.

Fair play to you. That's what I say. That's what blogs are for. Do what you want. It's obviously working out quite nicely.

Not that it's any consolation, being as how you don't know me from Adam and I'm not influential in any way, but I wrote about you in my blog and I liked your book. See.

http://katyboo1.wordpress.com/2008/08/08/friday-august-8th-norfolk-is-looming-like-a-big-looming-thing-shaped-like-norfolk/

God knows if that link will work, or indeed whether you will read it. But I hope it helps. AND I get quite a few rude people writing to me too, but I like shooting them down in flames in my blogs. Being vile to them stops me murdering the children, or slitting my own throat with a spoon.

Hope it made you feel better.

GoneBackSouth said...

Wow. Well said. I think this is when we people who rather like you and your blog look slightly embarrassed and comment about what nice weather we're having.

Seriously though, try not to let the slugs get you down. They're just an unpleasant part of life best ignored. x

The Grocer said...

Love it, Wifey does Kevin Keegan like outburst. Please read this out loud and put yourself on Youtube, forget the next book you could be the next big Youtube thing.Jealousy, all jealousy.

Henry the Leaphound said...

Please cheer up. Just leave them to it, don't read what they write and don't listen to what they say. You've a lovely family, lovely house and lovely life, remember that and it will all be ok x

bohemian mummy said...

Good on ya girl!! Good to have you back.

BM x

Ps. Your parcel is all ready and will be winging it's way to you tomorrow. Sorry for delay x

Just like me ... said...

OOOOHHHH I love you even more now ! I am smiling the biggest smile after reading the rant - as my wee lad would say .... "you just hit them in the goolies"

For every knocker there would be 1000s of us who love you to pieces, relate to you and wait to get our wifey fix ....

And what a fix it was today - I might just go punch the most annoying person in my stratosphere.

Le xoxox

PS you almost sounded Australaian today - we don't mind the off f word ...

Yvonne Young said...

Go Wifey Go. The sad gets who are winging about someone who has made it...pure jealousy.. the "My Dad`s bigger than your Dad" brigade, nowt has changed has it? And let`s not forget why most of us are blogging in the first place, because we read yours xx

Miriam said...

WOW! Good on you! mimi

Mom/Mum said...

Very well put WITN! F*ck 'em eh?
P.S. Am powering through your book. Love it. Enjoy every last bit of the copious cash!

jamon said...

Good for you!

Diane Foden said...

Thank you for that. I do love a good rant.

You remain the Queen of my bloglist, to give me hope that one day I will have enough readers to badmouth me, too.

Can't wait.

Ciao said...

Well that blew your cobwebs away girl, glad the "wifey" we all know and love is back.... xxxx

Henry the Leaphound said...

I meant to say earlier that although I haven't written about you on my blog you were the sole inspiration to begin it in the first place - living with a mad dog called Henry is enough to drive me completely mad and my/his blog is a brilliant outlet so thank you x

dottie said...

I can't say I know how you feel (I don't have a book deal, but I'm ok about that, grin) but I know that sometimes you just have to swear it all out. I'd call it a spot of therapy. Deep breath, feel a lot better, put down throat-cutting spoon. You don't have to show them what you are made of - they don't count in your life. And we already know and appreciate what you've done. There is a lot more positive than negative, so keep it up!!

I Beatrice said...

Would love to know who they were, so I could have a go at them too!

There's nothing quite like an early-morning burst of honest venom, I find.

Emchi said...

You know, I stumbled upon your blog and I'm glad I did. I haven't bought your book yet, but I will.

I think it's well written and more fool the people who don't like it. Each to their own. I just don't know why people who don't like someone else's blog have to then go and blog about why they don't like it...

I have to admit I am jealous you've got a book deal, but your blog is about two thousand times better than mine and completely worthy of a book deal. I'd best pull my finger out and write something worthy. Keep up the good blogging (I enjoy reading it) :o)

Hilary said...

Thank heavens this blog has comment moderation enabled. Imagine what you might have said were you allowed!
attagirl!!!
Have followed your book with Eat, Pray, Love - and am feeling far less alone!

Hil.Shep said...

Thank goodness this blog has comment moderation enabled! Heaven only knows what you might have written were you allowed!
Loved the book... bought it for all my friends.....they all loved it.....
and we are hardened literary types who put books down if they dont engage.....
Just ask, and we will march up and take Hadrian by the Wall.....

Sarah said...

Go Wifey!
xxxSarah

Harrogate is lovely! said...

Good on you Wifey!!

Remember - the only opinions that matter are those of the people that YOU yourself respect. Everyone else can go hang.

The bitchers and snipers that couldn't find their own talent using a microscope aren't worth the candle. It's all sour grapes. Plain and simple.

So chin up chuck. Keep on doing what you're doing.

Crystal Jigsaw said...

Weather's shocking isn't it.

CJ xx

30in2005 said...

You tell em! Idiots all - these selfish self-centred people!

As for writing the marvellous book. Good for you. Even better for us. Loved it. Can't wait for the next one.

Jaywalker said...

I really wish you'd given us a link, so we could go off and chuck abuse and so on, though I know it wouldn't be terribly ethical and all. Would have been fun though..

Africa Expat Wife said...

Ha,ha, well said!

There was a time when my blog was bombarded by mean spirited comments after The Times ran extracts from it during the Kenya election crisis in January. There was a lot of 'not another vacuous housewife' and 'you are inarticulate, illiterate' etc. I also wrote an 'if you don't like it don't read it, duh' post and miraculously nipped them in the bud, but in hindsight I don't think my post was nearly as powerful as yours!!

p.s. am still working on the book deal bit that was supposed to inevitably follow the press exposure ... sigh.

Paradise Lost In Translation said...

Golly, you must have read some seriously nasty stuff, that was quite a tirade! Is that what's called the price of fame? I mean, sadly, it's part of our culture isn't it, build someone up then knock them down. British culture and media culture. I'd hate it; you know you shdn't read it, but can't help yourself, then dwell on the stuff, and it festers away. Don't lower yourself to their standards. Rise above it. I guess once one is out in the public domain, it's open season. The one gd thing about it, I guess, is, it helps you see all the good things that are true for your life. You have a hubby who loves you, 3 healthy, happy children, a beautiful (finished)house in a beautiful setting, you have settled, made friends, published a book, you have a GIRL Friday! In fact I'd better stop, I'M beginning to get jealous;-)

LifeBehindTheCoach.com said...

flaming fabulous! you tell 'em!

Well done wifey, you've put them well and truly in their place uneducated little S***'s!

It's SO nice that someone has actually said what they think - so often you have to be nice to people and take the critisicm as 'constructive!' when you want to beat their head against something very hard.
WEll done honey xx

Nell said...

I get the trolls occasionally too, but luckily not many, most of my visitors are nice, except the one deranged bloke who claimed he had the same name as one of my heroes and wanted his picture put on the book cover. He sent me a photo where he looked like Fred West. I didn't think it would help my sales.

Alright Tit said...

VERY well said. Your blog is YOUR space, and YOUR place to be and write and comment on whatever YOU like (blimey, I'm so incensed on your behalf that I'm over-using capital letters, forgive me).

A while back I had a crisis of confidence about my own blog after being told that other cancer patients may take offence to the way I write about my own experience of it. But it's MY experience (there I go again) and, frankly, sod anyone else's opinion on how I choose write about my life.

I'm glad you've said what you have. And well done you on your success – may there be much, much more of it to come (if only to wind up the naysayers even further).

LOD said...

Loved your book, follow your blog now as a result - identify with lots of your chaotic family stuff! Good on you for your outburst at the "fat pigs"
Look forward to the next book whenever it appears.

sunshine said...

All right, Woman!!! I've been hearing this faint scratching sound for the past few days, and now I know what it was! It was your cracked and bloodied fingernails clawing yourself out of a dark hole. And isn't "fuck" a marvelous cathartic?

You have so many out here who admire and respect you ! -- you might be surprised that people who cross oceans to meet the author, would cross them again just to spend time with you, even if you never write another book!!

But you will.

Pam said...

*round of applause*

Isobel said...

Fantastic rant - and about time too! Quite apart from the fact that your moon - faced (guessing here , but I bet I'm right) detractors need to be told to button it or show you their own superior efforts, a surge of justified anger is a great antidote to the blues! Love the book.

Stinking Billy said...

Come on, Judith, you can do better than that. Stop the pussyfooting around and tell them what you really think. I have looked back through comments to your blog to see who, if anybody, might have been foolish enough to take you on in you in your own backyard, but I guess it must have been something you read while out visiting.

I certainly haven't come across any criticisms of you or your book anywhere. Nothing but praise.

But for God;s sake don't stop here. I so like the new wifey! ;-)

Heather said...

Quite fecking right too.

You're brilliant, they're jealous. Don't change a thing.

Heather Bestel said...

Go Girl!
Well said. It helps to get it all out and then relax.
Big hugs to you.
Heather x

billatbingley said...

We will be holidaying near Bamburgh (Warren Mill to be exact) between Sat 21st and Sat 27th September. Hope we may see you whilst we are wandering in Bamburgh. Please make yourself known to us if you see us. Malcolm mid 60's balding, grey beard and glasses, wife Dorothy and chocolate labrador - Ruby. We really envy you being able to live in such a lovely unspoilt area of outstanding natural beauty. We have spent many happy holidays in the area and enjoy reading your blog about the area and its people. Keep up the good work!

We read about you and your book in the "Yorkshire Post" newspaper and will be purchasing a copy whilst we are in Bamburgh.

short serving wench said...

and she says fuck ever so nicely..
keep the blogs coming

what happened ?how did i get HERE? said...

Fuck me! Great post! A rant a day keeps the blues away...!
Or as my mother used to say...sticks and stones...ignore them, and NEVER GOOGLE YOURSELF...like looking through a key hole or listeing at a door - you might not like what you see or hear!

Jen said...

love your blog - and this one is one of the better ones! Thank you thank you thank you for blogging!

Valleys Mam said...

Amen sister - ive had trolls all over me lately Ive had to moderate comments You are so right -it is your blog and you do not forceanyone here.You are talented and lucky and thats what makes the best of opportunities. Without talent you would be nowhere and blogging is hard work. Your book is great Your blog was one of the first I read regularly and its never bores - some compliment from me.

softinthehead said...

Well that title is going to bring you some "interesting" readers! Was that in the intention? I agree with you totally - its your blog - if they don't like it they don't have to read it!!

Lulu LaBonne said...

And well bloody done you - I first heard your story on the radio, it made my mornings start exceedingly well. Thanks
Lulu

Curly said...

Great thing about us northerners is that we have skins as thick as Rhinos. You will grow one too - it really isn't worth getting stressed over.

The blog is great, the book looks great, things are working for you - why worry?

justme said...

Oh good grief! Do NOT bother youself about other peoples envy!! I read your book and THEN found your blog, and love them both. And for the record, your blog is DEFFINATELY better and more interesting in every way than mine. You are a writer. And you are good! Keep it up and dont let other peoples issues about their own insecurities get to you!

TheoBee said...

Your blog counts in my top level.
Sometimes you make laugh, sometimes almost cry(tough fellow me)
But always you leave an impression.

Nice to see you in action again.

Theo

russelllindsey said...

Ha! This is so great. Trust me, there are a lot of people who really get you and what you're doing. More power to you.

Lindsey

* * said...

Good for you! Your blog is great, ignore the muppets. Aren't there a lot of people with too much time on their hands?

I loved your book and look forward to the next if you write it. Keep up the good work.

dollshouselin said...

Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!Especially when they wont allow a comment on their blog in your defence.Go girl go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shakespeare's Housekeeper said...

..What's that noise i hear..?
Must be the maniacal clapping of hands belonging to the bloggers who think your posts are fab.
Obviously i can't speak for the others, but if i ever feel i have to let rip at any underworld sloths that gurgle and bitch at my blogs/work, i hope i can do it with as much emotion and clarity as you.
I feel a million times better having read it!


Shakespeare's Housekeeper x

Miss Whistle said...

Ha ha ha! Good for you! People get so up their own arses (I don't really know a polite way to say that so there it is.)

F-word Mummy said...

Reading you book and loving it. Identify so much. We left London for rural Lanarkshire years ago. I used to cry at that raymond briggs animated movie about a polar bear when it showed him flying over the thames.

Loved your kick-back at the critics! What do they know?

cuthbertstgirl said...

Well said. For what it's worth,your blog is the first one I ever read and a year or two on, it's still my favourite. I'm sure the people who love your blog and appreciate your depth and your sense of humour far outnumber any poxy up-themselves egobloggers. I don't think that was very grammatical, but hey...it's the internet! Enjoy your success, Wifey. You deserve it.

part-time-mum said...

Wifey - ain't humans horrid on the whole? I just finished your book and I did just that - laughed, cried, reread bits - it was a bloody good read and I have now loaned to a friend. Well done you -you have the success, others just look on with green eyes.

Professional Mum said...

Good on you Wifely! Tell them all to go f*** themselves!
I thought your book was raw and wonderful - it did indeed make me laugh and make me cry.

Don't waste your time or energy on the green eyed monsters - put it into your next book instead!

Warmest wishes to you.

Expat mum said...

Cor, I bet you feel better after that! It's all jealousy and I agree that people who think they can write and should have their own book deal should get off their backsides and bloody well do it. It's not easy, and while it doesn't mean you're the best writer (not you personally), it means that some publisher thought you were good enough to pull some dosh in. And the bigger the advance, the more money they think you're going to earn for them.

Pam said...

Good on you!!!! I hope the rant made you feel better.
I have a sign outside my door at work. It says:
"To escape critisism, say nothing, do nothing, BE nothing" I have it as my mantra and you should too.
For every pleb out there there's 100 of us that love you.

DogLover said...

My, my, someone got under your skin, didn't he!

Are you as fearsome in person - or only on paper?

[Glad the book's doing so well. I read it from cover to cover as soon as it came out]

(Very) Lost in France said...

Good for you. New to your blog and haven't read your book (but I will of course) but can't stand the whingers who never get off their fat fannies to do anything yet complain about those that do. VLiF

Helga Hansen said...

Blimey... I can't believe there are still grown-ups who like to behave like playground bullies!!

I remember learning about you from Jeremy Vine's show, a good few years ago, and I've always loved your writing. I sort of lost your blog, and now I have found you again. Hurrah! I might just go and get the book now - you deserve the royalties! Good luck with the second one, too!

Pig in the Kitchen said...

In the silence that followed WITN's outburst, a pin could be heard to drop. Then came the sound of cheers,
'at last! She has spoken! To all those 'anons' that bitched away in the early days, for the occasional arses that leave 'pithy' comments, to all of these - and the weirdos that bitch away lost somewhere in blogspace - WITN has flicked a slender middle finger'

Bravo! Oh, and I do love some proper swearing instead of all those fucking asterixs.
Pigx

liana said...

Wifey,

They're all jealous. The easiest way to pass judgment is to do it on the internet, sitting behind a computer. Dooce, another blog I read has also experienced a lot of this same kind of thing, except she gets it emailed to her! And then occasionally she will do posts about the hate mail with her responses. It's hilarious and only makes these types of people look dumber. Anyway, even though it's on the internet, it doesn't mean it's mean to upset you or hurt you less - sometimes it even makes you angrier. Horrible people exist in life and in the virtual world as well unfortunately.

<3

-Liana
writepudding

Parisgirl said...

You don't need to get mad Wifey, you already got even. Best-selling author; fabulous! Hard not to respond to hurtful, hateful comments, but best not to. In my newspaper office we called it Tall Poppy Syndrome: rise too high and someone will try to chop off your head.
I was going to suggest you zapped this post not just because I'm old-fashioned about swearing but because the meanies being mean will be pleased they got to you. However, it appears I'm in a minority of one!
Enjoy your success.

rosiero said...

Funny - I left a comment on here yesterday and it is not there.

Mossie said...

Go, Wifey, Go! I'd have peed on their shoes for you.

BearLady said...

You've written a world famous blog, got a book deal and made history. This is because, as you rightly say, it’s a bloody good blog.

Yet you’re focusing n some negative stuff you've found in somewhere in the depths of cyberspace. Yours is a very human and quite endearing reaction but you've got to grow a thick(er) skin and rise above the negative stuff.

Because it doesn't matter how great your blog is or how shaggable you are or how many good deeds you do, there will always, always be those who find fault, or invent faults and voice their opinion. The more successful you are the worse this becomes, whatever your field, whoever you are.

That’s why I really pity those who go into politics with the intention of doing good, it must be hell.

I do hope you continue with your blog, I always look forward the latest entry and the book is great, I hope it isn't your last. The sad fact is though that you haven't read your last heinous comment, they’ll keep coming – just try to keep them in perspective.

First Hill said...

Awesome! Also, not all of us (probably not most of us) use blogging as bait for a book deal. Some of us just want a public (and anonymous) outlet for whatever happens to be going on. I'm no writer, but I am human and I do go through stuff, just like everyone else. If people can't relate then they should move on.

ladythinker said...

Oh Judiff - thank you, thank you, thank you, what a wonderful rant - I can't imagine what you've found in the blogsphere to set you off on this post. But, although it may not have been your intention I have to tell you {although I feel incredibly sad today} YOU have made me smile.
I have to say I enjoyed your book. I've just sent a new copy (I intend to keep mine on my bookshelf) to a friend recovering from surgery. But I do enjoy your blog even more ...
Best wishes to you ..

that girl ? said...

Great Rant! Now I am going to have to read the blog and buy the book! I've seen you on most blogrolls of my favourites so had to check it out.... and loved this post for my initiation!
You go girl! As for the jibes... they're all plainly jealous - green is not this season!

James Higham said...

Hmmmm.

Steve said...

Good for you. I personally think your blog is wonderful and I'm addicted to it - so pleeeeeese keep it going. Also I don't care how much money you make. If people carp its just pathetic jealousy. Most of them haven't got a brain cell. There are very few blogs around (I know - I've looked) which are as entertaining as yours (accept perhaps mine - go on - take a look - oblogotaryreading.blogspot.com). Please add it to your blog roll if it hits the spot. Yours certainly floats my boat. All the best, Steve.

Katy said...

I will never understand people who hate people for beign succesful. Way to fight back!

I for one love reading what you write. I think the writing on your blog is 1000 times better than the writing on mine.

I'm also thrilled to hear that your book is a best seller. Please write another!

roger said...

Don't give them the satisfaction. I'm dyspraxic with a little bit of dyslexia thrown in for good measure. Have been turned down for one art class, ignored by two writers groups and dumped by two outward bound courses in the last six weeks.

Their Loss!!!

Oh and just for good measure I can't make head nor tails of my blog site.

Mai-Britt said...

May never meet you, but love your blog - keep going, you are doing great!

Your book has just arrived, haven't had time to read it yet, but if your blog is anything to go by, I shall buy all your books, even 20 years from now.

And just look at the support you got from the comments.

mummyonthehill said...

Go Girl!!! I love, love, love your blog and we are going to read your book at our book club. F*** them, sad gits.

Xxx

DogLover said...

Someone got under someone's skin, didn't they!

Pete Ridges said...

I really like the book and the blog, and you certainly deserve the book deal.

I would just like to mention, as gently as I can, that I like your writing most when you don't swear. I'm sure you've worked this out, but a lot of people, including one or two of your friends, find swearing unpleasant (as presumably it's meant to be, that's its point).

Obviously, it's your blog, so feel free to write how you like.

Best wishes, and I do hope you get to enjoy life in Northumberland.

SueBee said...

My only criticism is I wish you'd blog more often, but understand you are probably a lot busier now. Ignore stupid jealous people who criticise. They don't have your talent for words.

MsCatCalls said...

excellent post ... made me laugh out loud

mutleythedog said...

To right my friend and - if I may say - about time...

auntiegwen said...

Well, that's them told, isn't it ?

Tismee2 said...

and YOU live in Northumberland - so there!

I'm very tempted to buy your book but it will probably have to go on the pile of others I'm part way through at the moment. I'm intrigued to see what you say about the area.
Gail

Polly said...

Wow, I bet it feels good to have that off your chest!

Parisgirl said...

Just tripped across this. You are not alone.

http://lorelle.wordpress.com/2006/03/20/mean-spirited-comments-and-blogging/

alfmcmalf said...

The trouble is I think you do care and that is why you felt the need to write this post.
Shame.

Just like me ... said...

Hello there - me again - this post made me laugh so much I have created a commemorative tee in it's honour ... the anti judith - blogged up and ready to rant - hee hee le xoxo

ps I will have to think of a much nicer wifey one to do too :)

http://231667.spreadshirt.com/us/US/Shop/Article/Index/article/The-Anti-Judith---Blogged-Up-and-Ready-to-Rant-3510531

missy said...

Ignore them, even my little blog which hardly no one looks at gets nasty comments sometimes. When I was off work with the m.e I had a couple saying things like, stop being lazy and get back to work. not the best thing when you have just started anti depressents.

Anyway congrats on the book, can't wait to read it and don't worry about the 'cyber bullies' they are just jealous.
Have a nice weekend Missy xx

Martin said...

Honest and heartfelt.

And yet they really fucking got to you didn't they?

Sure, that must be shit. However, wittering no-marks, bitter at someone else's talent, are ten-a-penny.

In future, don't go looking for them. They will always be out there, whether raging at you or at some other unfortunate who happens to be better than them.

Mind you, I daresay your rant makes for a more engaging blog entry than another diatribe about the weather.

Judging from the comments.

womagwriter said...

Applauding wildly here. Well said, missus.

Minnie said...

Well said! Perhaps you should consider hanging someone else in the coal shed instead of yourself!

Swearing Mother said...

Well said Judith, I couldn't have put it any fucking better myself.

Swearing Mother said...

Sorry, not used to you having comment moderation on, so I've pressed the button twice by accident.

I would love to know whose blog it was that had the bloody cheek to be mean to you. Losers, the lot of them, no doubt.

Let me at 'em.

Wife in Hong Kong said...

I am laughing my way through your wonderful book having first heard it on Woman's Hour. Am tempted to call my own blog "Wife in the East" as I am newly arrived in Hong Kong with four feral children climbing the walls. You guessed it, the move wasn't my idea either. Go grab that second book deal, we love your blog!

andypandy said...

Well that woke me up!

Since recently turning hmm....xxx (sorry, I still can't say my age out loud), I have developed almost turrets type symptoms of saying what I think and standing up for what is right. My Husband often feels the need to justify my actions by saying that I could be hormonal or just nuts. BUT WHY should we allow these horrible people to bully and intimidate? We tell our children to stand up for themselves and stick together - and that's what people have done on your blog - well done, all of you!
Try my trick - treat yourself to a bottle on the beach - forecast is good for this week. (rain, gales, but no snow)

Single Mother on the Verge said...

Crikey! They are obviously just insanely jealous: thing is no matter how much you got paid, or what you did before, or if it was based on a blog or not, or how much marketing etc. your book would not have made it and stayed in the bestsellers list if it wasn't a good book. Only a good book can really do that because it depends on readers saying, "you should read this book," and I was jealous of you too, at first, for about a week, and am sorry for that now. I think some people are harder on blog to books than other forms. But you really did prove yourself, a few sad fuckers can't compare with tens of thousands of readers. And R&J sofa too... and tv...and so on...

You'll write another stormer, meanwhile they'll be chewing on their toenails.

Stephen Cater said...

kudos! loving your work! keep it up!

Clara said...

fan-fucking-tastic wifey. that's the way to deal with sad jealous w*****s. I've been having a crap day and you've made me feel better by proxy.

merry weather said...

Those that can do.

Those that can't and are envious don't walk the walk, they sit in judgement. Who cares what they think - how boring they are.

Keep on wifey - I like you swearing!

Livvy U. said...

Yes! Yes! YES! God, I feel better for reading that. Good on ya.

The Rotten Correspondent said...

I've been reading you since way back when, and enjoyed every second of it.

People can be back-stabbing assholes, and when there's envy and money involved they're worse. God help you when you toss sex in, too. (So don't do that,okay?)

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm solidly in your corner. Me and half the blogosphere, judging from these comments.

Fuck 'em, I say!

Cuckoo said...

Fan-fuckin’-tastic! You rant for all of us who have ever had a gripe against the media but have not been in a strong enough position for our rants to be heard.

Your strength seems to be that you are just you and not ashamed of it.

I'm going to have to read your book now.

KAREN said...

I'm amazed you've had any bad press about your wonderful book, which I read at the weekend.

I'm about to recommend it in my weekly book review for the local paper and stumbled across this post while looking for an image of the book cover (as you do)and feel outraged that you should have to defend yourself like this. What's wrong with folk?? Envy, I suppose.

Anyway, good response and can't wait for your next book :o)

tartetartan said...

...and now you can go and wash your mouth out with soap! Ranting beats meditation any day. Fabulous!

Princess Abigail said...

Well, I think you're bloody marvelous.

Only just found out about your blog - now of course I plan to spend many long nights reading it all from the beginning ...

well done! Fantastic achievement!

Alison
The Bernard Bunch
France

Joanne Rendell said...

i just got cyber bullied in a nasty way, so i love loved this post! keep up the good work ...and keep getting handsome book deals. i'm off to order my copy of your book now.

Tatty said...

Bloody well said!!!! I finished your book during the school holidays while sunning myself in Spain, laughed out loud so much - can relate to most of it, and as soon as I got back found your blog. Didn't want to miss anything more.

If these a******** aren't able to give a constructive, or even a positive comment, then sod them... Bloody good rage though but don't waste your time getting angry with them they are so obviously jealous at your fantastic success.

I have never blogged or even so much as heard of blogging before your book and I'm thrilled to be reading every last word.

Keep it up Tx

Debs said...

I've found my way here from Karen's blog and according to her your book is a great read, so I'll definately be buying it.

Love the rant, good for you.

Annie Bright said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Angel said...

Good on you! It is total envy. SOunds like you have the right attitude, but it is bound to irritate(polite word)you.

Right then, I am off now to continue working on my own first novel! We can all dream...you have made it a reality and well done to you, all credit to you.

btw-I have just bought your book and have promised myself I can start it once I have done another 10,000 words!

warm wishes

ItsFairComment said...

A true diva x

Primrose said...

It really is amazing how many nasty people hide behind Blogs on emails and say things they would never dare to your face. Of course everybody gets envious and jealous of big success (Americans seem to get inspired by it however) You know you've made it when you are being knocked so publicly. I always thought you should ignore your critics. However, your response was so spirited and funny and so YOU that it's perfect!

Charlie @ So Lovely said...

You are simply fantastic!

Frogdancer said...

Ummm..... helloooo???
Just found your blog today. My mighty intellect grasped almost immediately that someone has tipped you over the edge. Or maybe you're always a little grumpy. I'm off to have a read to find out which one is true.

I clicked onto the competition site. Pity they don't offer airfares to and from Australia...

sensibilia said...

Umm, look, this is only because you like using words like "fuck" on your blog, and are not afraid of controversy or of baring your inner self in public.

(I am scared of same, which, along with the fact that I'm lazy and unmotivated, is why I haven't written a book).

Could you just write a post which asks your over-50's readers how often they have sex?

My husband told me yesterday that he was sure all the people we know (who are over 50, like us) have sex much more than we do. Like 2 or 3 times a week. I told him this is nonsense, and he is doing pretty damn well to get once a week. He didn't agree.

Now, I don't want to invite a load of perverts onto my blog, but you seem to have quite a few more mature readers amongst your followers, so do you think you could float the question?

I know this is cheeky, but hey, you seem like a really nice person (and my husband is from Leeds, and it's where we met).

cheshire wife said...

There is nothing worse than being ignored. And no, I have not been ignoring you, I have been on holiday.

Malc said...
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Braja said...

Ha! I love you! That was MARVELOUS! More more more to the fat pigs!!! Yes, Judith darling, ROLL IN THAT MONEY!! Revel in that PUBLISHED BOOK!! Laugh in the face of that ENVIOUS TROLL!!
OK, I've calmed down now...
But I'm still laughing.

Naomi Klein said...

Thank you - that was most entertaining and totally well said. Up theirs.

lowercase-v said...

hehe that's the spirit! you have a book deal they don't! a friend told me a about this post when i ranted on http://blogs.24.com/ViewComments.aspx?mid=d931703d-cae5-4844-b704-db703414df6e&blogid=6c6cea5e-c66a-49d9-bafe-95b1e5a560da about mean (yet not giving valid crit) bloggers on a new site i joined www.onelongminute.com

Yvonne Young said...

Talentless tossers, don`t listen, laugh at them, they hate it.

e said...

Yay you go girl! I would have curled up and whimpered and I admire your anglo saxon route out of the same situation!

two darts said...

just came across the blog with all the swear words. "Faintheart never fucked a fat pig". My sentiments entirely. I hope my blog is half as successful as yours. I HAVE written my book and very hard it was too. You say that you were 44 years old when you had your first book published, so I tended to feel a little less hopeful in getting noticed as I am 61 years old, ugh! sounds so old and dreary, but I am not. I dont seem to be getting many people looking or leaving comments. I was hopeful at first as there were four comments in the first day, but since then - Nought. I will keep trying.

http://miserymemoir.blogspot.com/

Jo Beaufoix said...

Heh heh, that is fantastic. I have your book on my Christmas list. You're one of the reasons I blog and I am having a brilliant time. :D

Linzi said...

hahahahahaha Good For You!!!! Go out and blow some of that well earned money on you and you kids!
Love the rant!!!!