Thursday, January 10, 2008

Do or diet

I have never really tried to diet before - I was never sufficiently bothered to count or weigh what I ate and who wants to get weighed in company? You might as well have "Life's victim" tattoed on your forehead. Ever since the baby girl though I have been bigger than I want to be. I blame having children certainly not biscuits. I still have a natural body weight - the natural body weight of a fat lass. That's not entirely true but I am definitely "packing" at the moment and when you are short that is not a good look. The problem I have discovered is that even thinking about going on a diet made me want to eat my head. I thought: "I know I won't rush into anything I will buy a diet book." Even better, the diet book had a whole list of things you had to buy such as health supplements. Now I may not be any good at dieting or for that matter exercise but shopping is a cinch. I flicked through the book and tried out a few recipes which for some reason are full of double cream and mayonnaise. What this means is that I am eating what I would normally eat while snacking on full-fat diet food and increased cake rations because I am suddenly conscious that I am hungry. I think I might just "lose" the book and buy an elasticated skirt.

27 comments:

Newmania said...

Should I diet or not? Its a bit Phillipa Space isn`t it ? I thought you looked rather elegant in the pictures I saw of you ,perched on a rock with wellies.
I have the body of a weight-lifting Greek god myself so its not a problem .

softinthehead said...

Loved your comment about "eating your head" - Oh how I can relate. The minute I am "on a diet", I am suddenly thinking about food 24/7, I'm just using more brain power and not eating any less because usually I don't think about it, I just eat it.

sunshine said...

The best way to lose weight really is to write down every morsel you put in your mouth. But it really is hard to write with chocolate in one hand and peanut butter crackers in the other!

Crystal Jigsaw said...

I say "do". Who wants to give up chocolate anyway?!

Crystal xx

aims said...

Isn't it amazing how the words January 1st can make us feel so conscious about the way we look?

shyoldgirl said...

Pull yourself together. Do you want to be called lardy thighs for the rest of your life?

shyoldgirl said...

Pull yourself together. Do you want to be called lardy thighs for the rest of your life?

Swearing Mother said...

Don't diet, just eat from a smaller plate (and don't fill it up twice like I did). Stop eating the kids leftovers and start wearing glasses. You may wonder why I mention glasses, but if you only have one pair you will spend most of your waking hours leaping up and downstairs, to and fro from your handbag to your bedside table, because you won't ever be able to find the bloody things. The pounds will simply fall off with the amount of exercise you will be getting. If you don't need real specs, just get some with plain glass for the purpose of this exercise plan.

On no account put the specs round your neck on a chain. That would spoil everything.

Expatmum said...

Just make sure you are really, really busy. I'm not talking about the usual wife, mother, worker busy - get yourself a project with a deadline. Not only will that have you working so hard you won't realise it's 3pm and you haven't had lunch, but you'll be waking up first thing in the morning with anxiety runs. Suggested projects include any kind of book deadline, (even though they then spend another year farting around with it), school fundraising projects (even though other parents never respect the deadlines), and organising any kind of elaborate party (as the date doesn't change.)

Claire said...

Was looking for a book on the Tate Britain in WH Smiths yesterday and all I could find were row upon row of diet books... then one caught my eye, whose title I wish I'd thought of ... it was called 'Get up off Your Fat Arse and Lose that Weight' or something similar. My kind of book I fear.

Winchester whisperer said...

Liz Hurley swears by the cabbage soup diet. Jerry Hall always said that a diet of grapefruits and boiled eggs for 3 days was a great way to shed inches before a shoot...(don't think she meant your kind of shoots)

occasional northerner said...

I resort in January to smoked salmon and mineral water. It works, but costs!

A said...

Love your blog! Interesting ideas about dieting. I am trying to eat 5 portions of fruit and veg a day and finding that hard, never mind actually having all the other stuff to think about too...have linked to you btw, hope that is ok! :))

Nicole said...

I suffer from exactly the same dieting related hunger pangs. Whats worse- when I was at uni and lived with a house full of dieting girls, I felt it necessary to eat for 4! Baby weight has forced me to deal with my former revulsion for diets, but I've developed my own coping techniques.
Diets are now always begun with the mantra "Every good thing counts." That means I am not allowed to diminish what small gains I may make in a day; every time I choose a carrot for a piece of a cake, its a success. Eventually, I figure, lots of small habits will build up, and when stacked end to end, they will make a healthy life.
But I'll just start with baby steps.

@themill said...

You could always go for the beige chinos and over sized t-shirt look....

Daniel said...

Dear Mrs. Wife-in-the-North

I haven't been following your blog for a while, what with the holidays, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years; I am so glad it is all over and can at last get back to plain, old, boring life. They should pass a law: the holidays are held every four years, like the Olympics.

Being an American, I think I speak authoritatively on fat. We are only 6 percent of the world population, but we have 98% of the world's fat. (I just made that up, it seemed like a good statistic).

To be thin and stay thin, you just plain can't eat much. Sigh; the sad truth (burp).

Norman said...

All this diet stuff is pure propaganda. Just divvent bothah with it. Take a few walks around Kyloe Crags or along the dunes at Bamburgh. It'll keep you trim and you might enjoy it. No guilt needed.

Retiredandcrazy said...

I like to call my diet "sensible eating", but which ever way you stack it up it's purgatory. Last night I had a break out and ate Thorntons toffees.

Now I hate myself, so to feel better I'm going out to a lardy bloater lunch.

PS - don't knock elasticated waists.

Mike said...

It's a simple equation- what you eat versus what you burn off.
A doctor was quoted as saying to fat patients who complained of slow metabolism that there are NO fat people in famine-stricken areas.
Personally, I favour the Atkins approach, with fish as protein rather than meat, and lots of walking. mimi not mike

Mopsa said...

Personally I think manufacturers of PCs should make the mouse REALLY HEAVY and the keyboard keys should be like pounding lead weights (remember manual typewriters?). Then all us bloggers could lose a few cals as we put our best and worst thoughts into the virtual ether.

Pig in the Kitchen said...

a gastric band should do it. There's bound to be an 'as new' one on ebay

merry weather said...

For me, losing weight after a baby at 40, has been not about diets but about getting unbroken nights sleep... Packing? Surely not wifey :)

lady thinker said...

If Liz Hurley does swear by the cabbage soup diet it's no wonder she has no friends

Sarah said...

My mate swears by 'I can make you thin' by Paul McEnna. She lost alot of weight. her kids are both fairly mature, compared to yourself- I lived on chocolate incentives, and a good strong cup of coffee, about six o'clock, to get me through to bedtime (the childrens' not mine). This lasted till the kids were both sleeping through the night.
Then again, I have always been a tad 'chunky'- call me 'curvy' these days, because Trinny & Susannah do.
There is always the way of the fitness DVD. If you don't mind the postie leering at you in your plimsoles as you slip across the floor in pools of your own sweat.

patsy said...

No wonder Jerry lost Mick if she ate all those eggs to lose weight.
I'm with Mr Jagger on this one, can't stand the ghastly things, no matter how free range they are. Gelatinous slimy whites and sulphurous yolks, yuck.
Tart in the bedroom Jerry? More like eggy fart...

Maggie May said...

I blame having children too.I am supposed to on a GI diet but that only works when you don't have a husband bringing home ice cream & chocolate & saying, "A small amount won't hurt you." Only its everyday so it does matter.

Sandra Montgomery said...

Every time I go on a diet all I can think about is Tim Horton doughnuts (a Canadian treasure). If I am not dieting, I never give them a second thought unless someone puts a box out on the crafty table at work. Why is that?

I have to lose one dress size to fit into the dress I bought for my daughters wedding in 8 weeks. All I want is a doughnut.