Friday, October 12, 2012

Trust me

So who do you trust as a mother these days? Is Jimmy Savile proof you trust noone? The desire to protect your child is visceral, primeval and urgent. From the moment they are concieved you do your level best to protect them. When they are born, you feel you would kill for them. As they grow, you tell them to wash their hands to keep them from germs and infections. You teach them how to cross the roads to keep them from road accidents. You are distraught when a playground bully pushes them or teases them or calls them names. We protect them even from themselves when they sit too long infront of the XBox or the television.

But what happens when we cannot see them, when we aren't there to keep them from harm. When they go to school. When they take up sport. When they want to sing in a choir, join the scouts, overnight at a friend's house. How then do we protect them from the violators and the monsters - from the worst there is in the world?

How suspicious do we have to be? How vigilant? Are we surrounded by those from the dark side? Surely not - they are not the norm, they are the ugly and dangerous exception. Perverts need access to children. We know they go where children are. When we aren't there to stand by them with a broadsword and shield, our children's best defence is surely their knowledge. We don't diminish their innocence by packing up knowledge and tucking it neatly into their lunchbox. Information is their protection. Tell them there are bad men, there is inappropriate language and behaviour, that noone touches them, that noone should make them uncomfortable, that there are no secrets between a mother and a child.

14 comments:

ADDY said...

I agree. Forewarned is fore-armed. Children are not even safe from teachers as recent news has shown. Telling them how to cope in a dangerous situation is the best you can ultimately do. After that, you really are in the hands of fate.

Gone Back South said...

Absolutely agree. It sounds like Jimmy Savile preyed on the very children that needed help the most - the not-confident, the vulnerable, those without families, the alone. Helping our children develop confidence, courage, a knowledge of danger, an instinctive sense of right and wrong and an always-open channel of communication is the best defence we can possibly pack into their life-lunchbox. GBS x
p.s. Nice to see you back :-)

Suzy said...

The World is such a dangerous place for.kids these days. Mine are 19 and 21 but I can remember feeling the fear of.letting them go.off tonshool, Brownies, Cubs etc its so sad kids.Miss out on these experiences fue to the evilness of a few individuals

All At Sea said...

So true... my children are 10 months and nearly 5. I have been worried sick since the moment they were conceived and friends tell me that it isn't about to get any easier!! x

Crystal Jigsaw said...

Well you know how vulnerable Amy is and I do feel the older she gets, the more vulnerable she becomes; probably because of her quite normal urge to explore the outside world as an-almost teenager. It's hard, but we can only do our best.

CJ x

Retiredandcrazy said...

There are rumours of there being a predator(s) in our area. It's terrifying. My greatgrandaughter was sitting on a bench at the bus stop waiting for her sister to come home from school when 2 men pulled up and asked if she wanted a lift.

Luckily at that moment the school bus came along and they drove off. It could have been entirely innocent, but we now go to great lengths to accompany them everywhere.

Shalet Jimmy said...

This is the second post I am reading today by mothers. Though I am not a mother, I think I do understand the worries of a mother from my mom...You are right. This is an unsafe world. You cant pluck the worries of a mother. But what I believe is that you can teach your children how to fight.....

Lauren Hixson said...

True. There should be no secrets between a mother and child for the first person that will come in defense of her child can only be the mother. Well of course, you gotta have those credible lawyers in oxford ms to get your message across to whoever messes with your child.

Sarah Cooke said...

Yeah I totally agree that children must not keep secrets from their mother. According to court reporting west palm beach experts, lying and keeping secrets may not give you protection, instead it will make your life miserable.

Reece Austin said...

I am a mother of three and I only want the best for my children. If given the chance, I would want to protect them from accident but I think that's inevitable. The best thing that I can give to suffice it is to get them insurance.

Tia Patterson said...

Trust should be built throughout the years. It is a matter of choice whom to trust or not. Weigh things carefully before trusting someone.

Lee Reinhardt said...

Indeed, the best teacher is one's own experience. However, there are experiences that you don't want your children to have before learning. As such, the experiences of other people like accidents from drunk driving, early pregnancy and the likes would be the best examples.

Jonathan Manning said...

I agree with Lee, experience is still the best teacher. My experience with car dealing business lead me to be good at it.

Marc Hart said...

Indeed. Children are most vulnerable even when they are just curious. So, it is up to parents to teach what they can from what ill-meaning people can do to effects of drunk-driving.