Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Close encounters

So, here I am again. Aliens abducted me. They had those strange lightbulb heads and the black almond eyes, and obviously there were probes. Thank God there were actually, because there's no Sky TV up there. Anyway, all things pall and we reached a deal - they'd bring me back home and in return, I'd send on a recipe for lemon curd. Well I'm back but truth to tell, I have never made lemon curd so there's a good chance they'll come back mad as hell. I'm planning to google it or at the very least lay in a few jars so I'll have them to hand if they start trying to suck me back into orbit.

2010 then, and I haven't even done a review of 2009.(I must do one, it's just I'm not that sure I want to look too close. There's a few messy bits.) As a rule, I enjoy auditing the year but my house was full of relatives and friends, and I didn't get the chance to do much more than think that next year I am booking my pal who runs a catering van to park outside my house and feed all-comers, that and "Is it too early to start drinking?" My parents arrived on the Tuesday before Christmas. Courtesy of the snow, the roads around us became impassable and my parents stayed. Then it turned to ice and the roads were too dangerous and my parents stayed. Then it rained and the roads flooded and my parents stayed. Eventually, I found them a way out through the ice and the floods but they decided to stay on the grounds it was a Tuesday and not a Saturday and my dad thinks the roads are quieter on a Saturday. Three and a half weeks after they arrived, they went home. Now, there's a dead sperm whale on the beach. You put a dead whale on the beach and it's begging to be a metaphor. Let's hope it's not a metaphor for the year ahead.

18 comments:

Ciao said...

Missed reading you hope the kids enjoyed Christmas and the snow, Tescos are selling cheep Lemon curd if you need any 24 pence.xxxx

belle said...

gosh, glad to have you back! Yours is a welcome voice of sanity in my chaotic life. Hmm, that could be worrying.

scaryazeri said...

Oh, you are back! Great stuff.
Shame about the sperm whale.

Having parents visiting for that long is my usual thing. I love it. :)

Gill - That British Woman said...

I popped by via Dulwich Mum's blog, as I am originally from Cumbria; I know the other side of the country, but close enough.

Congrats on getting your book published in Germany. Had you thought of having it published in Canada, as they can be a funny lot in the States, when it comes to the British!!!

I just had my first column published online in Britain: http://www.edenvalleymessenger.com/news/2010/january/blogger-british-woman-appleby-canada-and-back

Not at the book writing stage yet, but I know who to come to for advise,

Gill in Canada

rosiero said...

I thought you'd been eaten by a bear.

Mimi said...

Yay, welcome back! Missed you!
In fact, missed you so much I checked here 2 days ago to make sure my follower thing wasn't broken! Really!
Trick for the aliens- buy the cheap lemon curd in Tesco, mix in a good glug of booze- whisky would be fine, but any spirit you have to hand, then it will taste great and the aliens will be too drunk to abduct you again. Bingo!

Tony said...

Welcome back Judith. You have been missed by many.

Autumn Mist said...

So glad you're back, you've been sorely missed.

Annette Piper said...

Glad to see the Aliens returned you - I have a recipe for lemon curd if you need it ;)

We had relatives that wouldn't go away this year either. We love them, they're family, but still...

Gill - That British Woman said...

I hope you don't mind, I am putting a link back to your blog on my blog on Thursday and a little bit about your book.

Gill in Canada

billatbingley said...

Happy New Year Wifey! It's great to see you back. We were really worried about you. Didn't know what to expect when you had been missing - shortly after we visited you.

We wondered if you were stuck in due to bad weather over the Christmas period. We too had lots of snow, black ice etc. down here in Yorkshire. Keep up the blogging!

PS How's the new book coming along?

PPS We can recommend the lemon curd sold on Holy island - complete with mead.

sparky said...

That brought back memories. Well some anyway, as I can't bring to mind the name of the beach (between Foxton and Boulmer). A huge black whale stranded there when I was but a girl. Fascinating and very smelly. It was blown up eventually.

Enjoyed your evening at Barter Books. I'm a huge fan of BB. Good to see you back here.

Understanding Alice said...

hurrah you're back :) and hey what do aliens and dead sperm whales know about 2010... its all for the taking I say :)

Meloni Courtway said...

You're here! Mouse in the Pantry USA is so proud of you - not that you need me to be. Welcome back!
(oh, and below, where I must do a word verification before posting this comment - the word is "Binge" which I thought you might appreciate knowing:)

ladythinker said...

Reads and sounds a bit like an episode from the Hitch Hikers Guide. Glad the aliens let you free again . . .

But such a relief to have you back in bloggerland again.

midlandsgirl said...

just glad to see you're back....

Min said...

I'm really glad you are back - missed finding up what's happening 'up north'.

I am currently an expat and when my mum comes she stays eight weeks - about seven too long. She is so lovely but drives me insane and then I feel guilty - families!

There is a great episode of Limenviolet podcast where they talk about blowing up a whale that has landed on shore - very funny. http://limenviolet.blogspot.com/2009/06/episode-90-in-which-we-become-pro-whale.html

Anonymous said...

where have you gone? my mid day work lull isn't the same w/out your blog to read!