Comments on Wife in the North: May Day blues

I have two boys - 9 and 12. Chalk and cheese. Th...

2008-05-16T09:29:00.000+01:00

I have two boys - 9 and 12. Chalk and cheese. They've been fighting since the younger was born. I see no end in sight. The main thing is - they love it!

Punish both siblings equally for the crime of quar...

2008-05-13T11:45:00.000+01:00

Punish both siblings equally for the crime of quarrelling. No investigation into "who started it", both are at fault for escalating it. If your garden is private enough, punish them by throwing them out of the house. Otherwise shut them both in the same bedroom. (Part of the idea is to get them to gang up in sympathy against nasty mummy.)

Obviously also at another time suggest strategies so that situations won't escalate. And, as you are doing, try to ameliorate the underlying aggravating circumstances. But punish the unwanted behaviour, particularly this antisocial behaviour which will serve them badly in the wider world.

(Can you allocate your mother a responsibility? If she can't manage any household task, maybe working on a family scrapbook with memories of previous generations which only she can do.)

My daughter kicked her brother and then came to us...

2008-05-08T20:28:00.000+01:00

My daughter kicked her brother and then came to us looking for sympathy because her toe hurt.She got short shrift.
Unfortunately I think she actually broke her toe - it's bent now and she doesn't like it. I suppose that's how we learn our lessons in life.....

Poor wifey, sounds like hell on earth.We get days ...

2008-05-07T10:27:00.000+01:00

Poor wifey, sounds like hell on earth.
We get days like this and it is desperately miserable.
Hope things pick up soon, put a Peter Sellers movie on, I dare you all not to laugh.
Either that or Paint your Wagon, they never fail to bring us back to the human race.

In our house it's usually the older girl who makes...

2008-05-07T10:26:00.000+01:00

In our house it's usually the older girl who makes a mean face or says something I can't hear to wind up the little boy, who then retaliates by hitting her or shouting, and then he's the one who gets into trouble. NOT FAIR!

It brings out some urge in me, to attempt to make ...

2008-05-06T22:34:00.000+01:00

It brings out some urge in me, to attempt to make peace and heal the rift, between warring factions. I would always get so upset, seeing kids fight, then I realised, some kids like to fight and scream- it's just me that likes the peace and quiet.
There must be a kind of 1-10 of feuding, 1 being mild baiting, 10 being a case foe considering boarding school.
My mate was sent to boarding school cos her brother picked on her!
How bad is that?
If you are busy, and not sleeping, and your mum is poorly, nothing but an angelic chorus is going to feel anything like harmony.
Best wishesx

Even in our twenties my brother and I physically f...

2008-05-06T20:25:00.000+01:00

Even in our twenties my brother and I physically fight when we annoy each other. We get over our difficulties much quicker that way.

All the best with the boys!

Buy "Siblings without Rivalry"- it is American in ...

2008-05-06T13:17:00.000+01:00

Buy "Siblings without Rivalry"- it is American in its ideas, to the extent that you think "i can't believe i'm doing this" but it did work for me, mimi

re mutley hurrah hurrah hurrah. Well done you. Wil...

2008-05-06T11:42:00.000+01:00

re mutley hurrah hurrah hurrah. Well done you. Will you blog about them all, get fired and pick up sizeable publishing contract?

My [father's] family has lived in this valley for ...

2008-05-06T10:53:00.000+01:00

My [father's] family has lived in this valley for 500 years. I sometimes wonder how I ended up here, marrying a local man with whom I share a distant ancestor (at least seven generations ago, so I think we're OK ;-), having grown up in a different country and culture. It must be in the genes.

Love your writing.

orchidea

http://www.orchideareflects.com

I hope you are not expecting advice on child reari...

2008-05-06T10:32:00.000+01:00

I hope you are not expecting advice on child rearing - as if you do get any it will be useless. I got offered and accepted a new job - starting 19th May! In the meantime Iam gardening and writing..

Eggs at my place!CJ xx

2008-05-06T10:15:00.000+01:00

Eggs at my place!

CJ xx

wifey, just remind yourself now and again that you...

2008-05-06T09:24:00.000+01:00

wifey, just remind yourself now and again that your little troubles are, er, experience and that without them you could be bored in no time at all. There now, wasn't that a help? ;-)

I have two - 4 and 12. I'm not sure how they do it...

2008-05-06T03:09:00.000+01:00

I have two - 4 and 12. I'm not sure how they do it but they still manage to argue and beat the crap out of each other - and the 12 year old usually comes off worse.

And it's not just posh people who go back that far up north. A few years agoI traced my family and got my dad's family back to 1643 - with only one Scot in the whole mix. Most of them had not budged from the NE. Fascinating and boring at the same time.

If you find out how to make brothers to get on wel...

2008-05-05T23:12:00.000+01:00

If you find out how to make brothers to get on well together, do let me know. It would be personally very useful, and we could go into business together and market the idea. There is a huge demand. We could be rich and famous.